April 11 – 23, 2010 - Natchez Trace Trail

This a narrative about a bike ride on the Natchez Trace Trail Parkway with Amy, Barry, Jerry, Marilane, Rick, and yours truly. The trail was about 450 miles long with no stop signs or stop lights.

My training for this ride consisted of two jet skiing trips. One in the mouth of the Columbia and out into the Pacific Ocean (39 degrees). This was a fishing trip and I caught 5 rock fish. Jet skiing from Milwaukie, OR to the mouth of the Willamette River (40 miles round trip in a hail and rain storm going 50 miles per hour). Without a shield or glasses that can hurt your face a lot. How this helps you bike ride, I do not have a clue. I did do two 30 mile rides this year for training.

Airplane connections were always very interesting for me. I did a bad job of reading my connection and ended up at the wrong gate in the Salt Lake City airport. I was talking and thought I knew where the right gate was. When I went to it, there was no one there. I read the wrong flight ticket and had to walk very fast to the right gate. I made it 5 minutes before the flight took off. Good thing or my bike ride would have been in Utah.

I read the wrong schedule again and sat in the wrong seat. Finally found my seat and was seated by a very large guy who expanded over the seat and slept the whole flight.

On the way back the boarding pass they gave me was only to Seattle and they left off the one to Portland. I was able to alert the clerk to this and she worked very hard getting me the right boarding passes – like two. Coming home worked out really well.

Chuck picked me up at the Austin airport and lost his car in the lot. I did a lot of cross training carrying my suitcase up and down the stairs. My experience at airports keeps me thinking all the time.

After Chuck took me to his home in Georgetown, Texas, and I was sitting in a lawn chair drinking lemonade in 80 degree weather, I decided I could get used to this. Stephanie cooked a great dinner for us that night. They were great hosts letting me stay in their home before the ride.

Chuck’s friends in Georgetown took me on a 27 mile ride. It was 30 degrees warmer than I am used to. I thought I was going to die.

Chuck and I rode bikes around the city of Georgetown just to look at the neighborhood. The next day we rode around with the local bike club. The locals just ride around in the neighborhood a few days a week for exercise. It was fun being with them.

The next day it was a 450 mile car ride with Barry and Rick. We crossed the Mississippi River in a big rain storm. I was thinking “Oh Joy - Rain to ride in.” - but there wasn’t a rain storm the whole ride – just driving to and from.
Rick was able to get me a free room. I can pay for free!

Rick left the keys inside the place we were staying. (The only keys to the place) He closed the door and it locked. This caused some real concern, but it was no problem. The window was unlocked.

In Natchez we went down the hill and had beer at Down Under. This old tavern was a real hoot. This part of town used to be really rough and tough, whereas the upper part was where more millionaires lived than any other part of the world in the 1800’s.

We then rode through town on our bikes and looked at the old houses that were fixed up and some little shacks that had some broken windows and was really in the slums. That’s the part of the bike ride I led. I don’t know why the other guys left when I was taking a picture in the slums. A guy came out with two dogs and wondered what I was doing.

That night we went to dinner and a buggy drive which was one of the best narrated rides I have ever done.

The only thing about the first day of the ride is that it can’t get any better. It was one of the easiest 80 miles I have ever experienced.

Day Two of the Ride: There were lots of cars. We went by a big reservoir. At the reservoir Rick did a barbeque lunch for us. He was the best sag person for feeding us. We saw trees growing in swamp water. With 15 miles to go, I did what I never do – that is Sag. Being used to the cold, the heat got to me. It was better to quit than fall on the pavement. I am so smart. People say I am a “Smart blankity-blank,” so it must be true. At the end of the day, since he was sag driver, I asked him to carry my bag in. So, in a real Southern tone of voice, he said, “Mr. Byran, let me carry that for you.” It was real neat the way he did it. It was a lot of fun to get the people to talk with a southern accent.

Day Three was half way. It was cool all day, not many cars. What are not many cars? Well if there is time, you can lie in the road for 15 minutes and not get run over. That is the answer to not many cars. When they do come, they come from both directions at the same time. It is just Murphy’s law.

The B & B meals were great for the entire trip. If you like flowers and blooming trees, this was a good time to go.

It is very rare I find someone who talks and is more annoying than I am, but I found one. I talked to him at an information turnout. The ground was all turned up. I said, “Why?” He said the armadillos dig the ground up. The snow in the winter used to be knee deep and now it only comes up to your ankle. He did have only one tooth on the bottom. These were clues to my upcoming problem.

Thinking this was all done, I was wrong. As I rode down the road, I looked in my rear view mirror. The guy was following me. He was on the white line, then over the yellow line, then in the grass, and back over the white line. We were going 15 miles per hour (my top speed). Cars were passing both of us. Oh good, an informative sign to read. I pulled off to read the sign and he followed me. I now know everything about him, his kids, and everything there is to know about him.

Marilane, our support, comes driving up and asks what’s keeping me. This gives me a good excuse to leave. So off I go. I am down the road ½ mile and there he is again trying to keep the car between the lines, not doing a very good job. I am eating an apple while I am biking so I pull way, way off to the side in the grass. Oh yes, he stops and parks in the middle of the yellow line, and tells me how he drove this road for 20 years. I finished my apple and said I had to go. He drove on over the grass and made a “U” turn. He parked in the middle of the street again and continued to talk some more. I started riding so he left to make a turn to get off the parkway. I was thinking he was lost. I checked my mirror very, very frequently for the next 20 miles.

We rode by a spot where an arsonist set a fire in the woods and it was still burning. They said if they catch him, he is in a lot of trouble. Most of the cars gave you lots of room. Motor Homes? It was questionable. There was no commercial driving on this road. A trucker and a policeman were holding a lot of paperwork. I think he got busted.

Day Four, my turn to drive sag. I rode the bike 30 miles. Then Amy finshed the biking part and I drove the rest of the day and the next day. Nowhere close to as exciting as biking the Trace. The bed and Breakfast that night had a toilet that growled and thundered and made lots of noise. Anyone getting up in the night to go to the bathroom was forbidden to flush it. The roll of paper, when you sat down, was so close you could wipe your nose and not lean over very far. This B & B had a very interesting design.

It was good to see Valli for dinner the last night we were all together. She was working in the area and stopped by. A week later Valli wrote and I quote: “The tornado afterwards was pretty harsh for Mississippi. It has been cold and raining ever since. When I got to work on Wednesday the locals referred to the city we ate dinner in as "Hole in the Wall." So it was really, really sad that we didn’t get to experience the tornado up close and personal.

Marilane and Amy flew back and Jerry and I drove back to Austin. Barry and Rick also drove back to Austin. Jerry dropped me off at Chuck and Stephanie’s and I got to experience one more great dinner at their house.

This ride has much green and only two way traffic. You put city and lake together and you get lots of traffic. There is only one little spot with this problem. The rest is smooth and not much traffic. You did remember what “not much traffic” is, didn’t you? The history of the Trace is mind boggling.

Tell me again why you are not biking today? www.mrbontheside.blogspot.com More Mr B